I heard that TreeSoup® might cause permanent scarring
We've all heard the rumors, emails, judge's rulings, but does that really prove anything? Find out for yourself if TreeSoup™ is right for you. And don't bother asking your doctor, he'll probably tell you no -- instead, just ask for a prescription to blu ray fart™ and then change it to TreeSoup® -- Prepare Now For Your Death!™ --yourself!
Before it's too late, before the world's economy collapses, before we become slaves to our Robot Eyes overlords, for the love of god, stock up TODAY! Tell them Glenn Beck told you to!